Thursday, July 9, 2009


NUMBERSSS???? Sorry, not my cup-of-tea.

I usually dwell a lot with my temperol lobe, just messing around the Wernicke's area and Broca's area. Fancy being there most of the time..

But errr...the other half of my brain is rarely used, that is to say..conciously of course. So quite often when I look at a car's registration number, I'll be like..ok,JLA ....hmmm..let's see, what's the number again?? Something of that sort..

So, why on Earth la they gave me this 'accountant wannabe' job? Big mistake la. I was asked to close the account of our *** and that means I have to calculate every penny which got in and out of the so called 'organisation'. That spells trouble of course. First count, RM**, second count RM**,urmm ok, let's do it again. Third count RM**. Ok, I need aspirin. No matter how many times I count 'em, they just 'refused' to balance..the debit and credit. Now, where's the loophole? It's not about 'where did I spend, or rather the org spend the money?' but 'where the heck did this amount come from??' kinda loophole. Bugger..shall I just smile sheepishly to my boss and being foolishly honest,[my bad, i did not balance the account frequently] or shall I keep my cool and give her my I-can-justify attitude? Then again, how to justify an imbalanced account?

If it's other things I could still 'goreng', mix and match here and there, relate and later get entangled, but figures don't lie. Shait, maybe they should learn to 'bend' a bit. So I guess honesty is the best policy then. So, does translucent and transparent share the same meaning? I guess they do, but of course, to a certain extent:)

Problem Solved. [for the short-term yessss..]

I promise I'll dig to the inner core after this.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Some People...

Some people live their lives from day-to-day basis.
Perhaps they have nothing at the back of their mind to be worried of
They've got everything they need
They have a place called 'HOME'...a place somewhere they belong to.
They have family...a Mom's shoulder to cry on when something in life goes wrong
A Dad's hand to kiss, a man whom they know they can always depend on.
Emotionally, financially, the list goes on.

Knowing that there's always someone to turn to, there's always a place to go home a bless.
So life is made easier...for those lucky people.

But some people couldn't help but to keep on thinking and worrying.
Some people are ripped off the luxury of 'feeling at home'
Some can only yearn to even say the word 'mom' again
Some can only wish quietly to have their dad to be their 'back-up system' for everything, if you know what I mean..
Things taken for granted by those lucky people are like 'dreams come true' to some people
Like heaven on earth...

Although life is like shit...although workloads are killing me...although I'm broke every month...although my bf is a 'duhh..' I would definitely smile as if nothing happen and laugh my heart out loud, IF only...

Surely each person is destined for different destiny...but somewhere along the road, one couldn't help thinking y'know, just thinking how things could be different...

Yup, with no mistake I made a PACT with HIM before I came here. I said YES to everything He promised me...whatever they were. By now, I knew perhaps almost a half of what He offered me back then...the other half or more is for me to pray and work for.

I have faith, InsyaAllah.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Life is a climb, but the view is beautiful

Life is a climb, but the view is beautiful
I can almost see it
That dream I am dreaming
But there's a voice inside my head saying
"You'll never reach it"
Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking
But I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high
There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb
The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down
But no, I'm not breaking
I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most, yeah
Just gotta keep going
And I, I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on
'Cause there's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!
There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Somebody's gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!
Keep on moving,
keep climbing
Keep the faith, baby
It's all about, it's all about the climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith, whoa
Ya Rabb, kurniakanlah aku kesabaran yang menggunung, ketenangan yang tak bertepi, dan iman yang tinggi melangit...kerna dugaanMu padaku bak jurang yang terlalu dalam, bak lautan luas yang bergelora, dan bak api yang menjulang
Ya Rabb...aku tak ingin lemas dalam kesedihan, tak ingin sesat dalam mencari arah tujuan, dan tak ingin hangus terbakar dalam rindu yang takkan pernah kesampaian...

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Thank You VS Batang Kayu

I was sitting half patiently and half blurry this morning waiting for the first session of the 'Latihan Dalam Perkhidmatan' course to start. While waiting, I was actually doing some mental preparation: I was preparing myself for the worst thing the course could ever offer: TOTAL BOREDOM. I had my sweets in my handbag: checked. I had some junk food as well: checked. A mineral water I took at the foyer before I climbed the staircase: checked. KakFiza's 'kacang kari' that we were about to share:) : checked. So, practically I was physically and mentally prepared to battle this 'Saturday Blues: O why did we have school on almost EVERY saturdays??'

Little did I know..and little did I expect that the first session turned out to be fun at all. I'm telling you, it was a real fun with no added silly jokes nor blue jokes: a cliche to most speakers. I enjoyed it to the max cuz not only it was fun but informative, captivating and motivating as well. Kudos to the speaker of course.Hehe. He reminded me a lot of 'Haji Bakhil'...and a glimpse of Dato' Jamali Shadat. Those characters needn't further introduction aite? Hearing those names made you unconciously smile. See? Like what you're doing rite now :P

Haji Zakaria was his name (Z pronounced as J). He talked about the working cultures and values of teachers yadayada, which most of us in the profession had probably known and pretty well-versed already. But, being normal human beings, we do tend to forget, and we do tend to not always practice what we preach, or teach. Like some teachers said, 'ikut apa yang saya cakap, bukan ikut apa yang saya buat'. In your dream-lah cikgu. Kids are the best copier, fyi.

Anyway, it was this thing that he said that triggered my interest to listen more attentively. He quoted a courtesy research done by Readers' Digest years back. The result was..jeng jeng jeng..wait up, hold your applause. Well, second thought..don't even think about it! Cuz we ASIANS and MALAYSIANS especially were declared to be among the rudest, 'takde sivik' punya people of all people on planet Earth. Out of 36 cities where the tests were being held, we're at bottom number 34. The least courteous number 34. I was ashamed, so ashamed to hear that. Berbudi-bahasanya lah orang Malaysia kita ni ekk.
Anyways, they did 3 tests:-
1) Saying Thank You
2) Holding door for people behind you
3) Helping to pick up dropped papers

Thank You vs Batang Kayu
It's pretty hard to admit that we rarely say 'thank you'. When we go to the mall, just check the payment counter and see whether the cashiers say thank you or not? When being served with food or drinks, observe whether the customers even bother to say thank you at all. Even if they did, see again whether they're smiling or not. Hardly aite, muka like batang kayu. Oh yes, as teachers we do hear lots of 'Thank You, teacher' each day. But honestly, can we actually feel the real appreciation behind those many thanks they said? Those monotonous 'terima kasih cikgu'. It's like a recorded response when we call McD Delivery. 'Sila tekan 1 untuk Bahasa Melayu' kinda response.

Door Stoppers vs Door Slammers
I read somewhere about women's taste for men and it's just logical that women tend to fancy 'gentlemen'. No sane women would prefer rude, calculative, selfish men and vice versa. But sad to say, most Malay men are less gentlemen. They don't put women first in many things. They don't hold the door for women for example. I am not implying that I'm a chauvinist.In fact, male and female are equal in this matter, it's just that it looks more obvious when a guy does it. It is a social expectation that men treat women with modesty and courtesy. We, male or female, don't hold the door for strangers. Perhaps we're not brought up that way, or perhaps it is not in our Malay culture to hold doors for others. Whatever the reasons, as teachers especially, we should do it as it is important to show that we're thinking of others and not just ourselves. It doesn't take a lot to hold the door, or would we rather prefer for the door to slam the people behind us? What if we're the ones whose being slammed by the door due to the selfish act of the person in front us?

Pick Up vs Pekak
Sometimes when we are in a hurry we tend to mind our own business. We might thought of stopping to help a poor old lady to pick up her scattered groceries. But a thought remains a thought. Plus, we thought we're in a hurry and there are still others around who could help her. We 'buat-buat pekak' and continue rushing. Weird enough, we sometimes do so even when we're not in a hurry at all. Biarlah orang lain buat punya attitude is sooooo dangerous. What if everbody else think alike, then nobody would do it. The same with picking rubbish. This is what I personally observe in my school. The kids are so berkira when being asked to pick up the rubbish at areas that are not theirs. A sweet wrapper just 10cm away from their desks, then everybody would stare at it, not wanting to pick it up cuz apparently 'it's not under my desk'. Aiyya..I don't know whether they're so genuinely lurus bendul cuz I said 'pick up rubbish under your desk', or what. When they are in the canteen during recess, nobody would ever bother to pick up the bread wrapper lying on the floor, not until being told to do so. Kalau seminggu kat situ, seminggulah tak berkutip. Memasing buat pekak.

So kudos to my fellow Malaysians for being imPOLITE. This I did not say, but was research- proven by Readers' Digest. Take it anyways we like, but I hope we take this criticism positively.
Some might argue that we have different 'cultural standard' with the western world thus the measuring of 'politeness and courtesy' is rather 'subjective. Still, it only needs simple logic and sensibility to think of others rather than being selfish, and to do good deeds to other people like what our religions taught us. As Muslims, we should be wayyyyyy more corteous, shouldn' we?